Just Let It Be

Sometimes I get so tired of doing I just want to be. Need to be. Actually let me take that back. I SAY I just want to be, but I don’t don’t want that. What I mean is I want to consume. Music. Food. Television. Whatever. And that’s just another form of doing. We go from one form of doing to another. How bizarre.

Because there’s a big difference between being and consuming. I feel like we as humans in today’s modern world go between doing and consuming all the time.

We never stop in the middle. In fact, I personally think we’re afraid of the middle. Being in the middle. Just being. Maybe I’m projecting because I can definitely say just being TERRIFIES me.

I think that’s what all this mindfulness talk is about. Just being. I think we’re terrified to find out who we really are. What are those thoughts that exist when everything else clears out? Is who we REALLY are what we thought we’d find? Is it extraordinarily different? And what are we going to do with that knowledge once we know we’ve really just been faking it all this time? What do we do with it? Seriously? How do we handle all that baggage?

It’s MORTIFYING. So most of the time it’s easier to stay busy. SO BUSY. And there’s so many things to keep us busy Nowadays. Social media, the news, work, family, your drama, other people’s drama, whatever. You name it, it’s distracting.

It’s so funny when you get really quiet you find out some shocking things about yourself (that maybe aren’t REALLY that shocking but they sure are diametrically opposite to what you’re doing now so that’s a start).

Like oh hey maybe I actually like going to bed early and most television are not actually something I like (I just watch them because…it’s something to do). Go figure.

And then the next obvious question is…ok. So now what?

Those questions I do not have answers to. Too complicated. I’m still trying to do the whole not being busy bit. Le sigh. Hopefully time makes all things easier.