Notes On Very Public MeltDowns

So I was talking to my friend and she was like oh man Anu.  I was reading your blogs.  I loved the way you publicly melted down.  That was epic.  I hadn’t actually thought if it like that until now but I was like…yeah.  That happened.  It’s mainly because I tried to see a therapist and she was like…uh…blah blah blah…I think we’re done here, you don’t have to come any more.  And then I’m like…BUT I”M SITTING HERE STILL CRYING IN YOUR SEAT USING YOUR ENTIRE BOX OF TISSUES WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM WOMAN.  Except I didn’t actually say that, I just said ok and stopped going.  And then I tried to find a better one, but I think all the real ones actually charge shit tons of money and have years of waitlists I don’t really have shit tons of money and I’m impatient AF so I was like…THE INTERNET IS MY THERAPIST.

Also, I really really enjoyed reading other people’s ish around when shit was hitting the fan so I was like…lets contribute to this body of literature.  Public melt-down-ing. That’s a genre now.

Things are somewhat chaotic but I think things will always be chaotic. I’ve decided my life is always going to be chaotic.  For the near to distant near future at least.  I am going to call it…un boring.  Sometimes in the morning I struggle to get out of bed, this is true.  Mostly because I’m dreading what’s going to happen that day. Also, sometimes, my biggest accomplishment is taking a shower.  Or so it feels.  I didn’t just stay in my pajamas all day.  I took a shower and got dressed.  YES.  And other days are really great.  I”m up before my alarm and I’m on top of my ish.  Sometimes I avoid the world for a few weeks, and sometimes I’m all about trying to meet people.  It’s a grab bag really.

Anyway, that’s what the world of Anu looks like right about now. Chaotic AF and who knows what the day will hold.

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